Bush
No, this won't be about Dubya... Just something that happened several month's ago.

I was at my mom's one day helping her around her place and while I was washing her windows she approached me with a very odd request. Realize that she is around 70 years old and I'm 40, and this is the person who raised me and my siblings:

Mom: Can I get you to do one more thing before you go?

Me: Okay, what'cha need done?

Mom: Will you ball my bush?

Me: (with a look of extreme bewilderment on my face) Whaaaat?

Mom: Will ya ball my BUSH?

Me: What are you talking about?

Mom: (beginning to look irritated) Will you BALL my BUSH, MY BUSH... IN THE FRONT?

Me: I have no idea what you are aking me to do!

Mom: (becoming extremely mad by now) Will you ball my bush in the front, the front, Matt (my brother in-law) always balls my bush in the front... do you think you can?

(You have no idea what was running through my mind at the moment)

Mom: Just get the hedge trimmers out to the front of my place and shape the bush so it is more round please. Do you think you can do that for me?

Me: (slowly realizing what she was asking, as well as how warped my mind is) No mom, I am not that good with hedge trimmers.

Mom: Well, I guess I'll have to get Matt to ball my bush...

Me: Yep, I guess he will have to do it.

I think I need help... some serious help...